Moral Majority My Ass

Last week, after the epic ruling to cut funding for NPR by the House, Anthony Weiner got up and gave a really sarcastic speech about how he's glad that the economy is fixed and so many jobs have been created so that we can move on to more important things like going after the enemy that is NPR. Weiner is entertaining but I kind of thought it was a dick move. At the very least, the House was looking for a way to cut unnecessary funding so tax money could go somewhere more appropriate or dare I say...into paying off the deficit?

So I probably have a little bit of a reputation for obsessing over religion and for anyone who thinks that...I probably have to just give it to you. I really do do that. Now I'd like to tell you why. First watch this video of Louie Gohmert the very next day making a motion to reaffirm "In God We Trust."

Now yes...Louie Gohmert believes in "Terror Babies", regularly invokes the Holocaust into things that have nothing to do with the Holocaust, and thinks Congress should carry guns around with them on Capitol Hill all day. I'm not really expecting him to be the voice of reason but what type of asshole do you have to be to start campaigning for something that nobody is opposed to in the first place? I realize that "In God We Trust" is on our money and written in all types of public places and there are some ambiguous complications for that with the whole church and state thing but was this really bothering anyone? Like, it wasn't enough for it to be there but now we have to agree on it? Are you really so fucking insecure about your faith that you need your public display of God mottos to be reaffirmed for you? It's not enough for you to start every day with prayer but now you want us to as well and you have the audacity to bring this up during a house motion?

“I am hopeful and it’s my prayer that in support of this resolution by my friend [Representative] Randy Forbes (R-VA), that we can help reeducate America in an area it has been dumbed-down,” says Gohmert. “People need to be reminded and we need to make sure that a majority still supports that because, as Reagan said, when we cease to be a nation under God, we will be a nation gone under,” Gohmert says. “When you know enough about our heritage, and our wonderful President apparently doesn’t know very much about our heritage, then I think it’s important that some of us help educate those who didn’t have the history teachers that maybe they should have.”

FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU!

Sorry Gohmert...you can not give that speech and then claim that America has been dumbed down. You guys don't get to lay claim to the moral high ground anymore and in a world where people weren't so god damned afraid to think, you never would have. This sanctimonious bullshit is and always will be the biggest problem with the religious right. Falwell and Reagan even had the audacity to call it "The Moral Majority." I'm sorry...but you don't get that. This isn't specific to Republicans either. Where I live every one is liberal and Catholic which as you could imagine makes you quite the walking contradiction. I always wondered how someone could be politically agreeable to something but then have no problem considering themselves an upstanding member of an organization that morally condemns it. Like how does a Catholic lobby for women's right? Fuck...how does woman even be a Catholic at all?

I realize that like 80% of this country is drinking some sort of Jesus Juice on a regular basis and so I have no issue with you calling yourself a majority. It's the moral part that you really need to investigate. This is not to say that you can't be a Christian and have morality...you just can't be a very good Christian and have morality. These are the people that are far too pragmatic to buy 99% of the bullshit that's being sold to them but will go on believing in virgin births and physical resurrections just to make sure they're not messing around with their salvation. They don't necessarily believe in Rapture but if it really does go down like that, you bet they want their asses covered.

So you're still saying "As long as religious people aren't bothering anyone...what's the problem?" Well I can't address 30,000 religions so let's stick with the one that Gohmert is talking about. I get that he probably doesn't feel as strongly about his faith as he's letting on. I get that he's clearly just using time at work to pander to a bunch of retards that eat that shit right up. What I don't get is how you can stand there representing America and alienate so many people that are part of this country without batting an eyelash. Do you know what the most important word is in "In God We Trust?" It's not In, it's not God, and it's not Trust. "We" as in "Americans" and if you don't subscribe to the bullshit we're selling, you cease to be an American. This is morally reprehensible and as hypocritical as you'll ever see. It was Jesus who talked about not judging, right? I swear I read that in the bible. As a matter of fact...

...The Bible. Ew...The Bible. Some people theorize that you can't have read the Bible and still be a Christian because reading the bible will make you an Atheist faster than anything you could possibly look at. Let's pretend anyway, that although homo-sapiens have been around for like 100,000 years, that God just decided to spend a couple hundred years talking to a select few illiterate poor people in the desert a couple thousand years ago, have a son with one of them, and then he wrote a book about it which is sacred and divine to Christians all over the world. Except the problem is that the bible depicts God as maybe the most insecure deity that's ever been dreamt up. Could somebody all-powerful and all-knowing actually be as jealous and spiteful and as big of an asshole as that guy? "Oh, but what about the 10 Commandments, Vandelay? This is the moral guide for a whole civilization!" No it isn't. The first three commandments are all about making sure you don't cheat on God. I mean, Thou Shalt Not Kill is great and all except for the fact that God spends the whole book either killing people or commanding other people to kill people. Let us not forget the celebration of slavery, incest, rape, hate crimes, and misogyny throughout this sacred screed. I'm sorry...but you simply can't read that book and then say to yourself..."Yup...that's my guy"...and still consider yourself to be morally superior to anyone in any way.

Hey, who needs a book though? How about a little common sense? I'm positive that the reason that assholes like Gohmert and his sheep claim the moral high road is that at the most basic level, they don't believe you can have morality without religion...without God. They don't believe that you can go anywhere in life without prayer. Well, I think it's hard to have morality with religion. A lot of religious people tell me "So what if people live a moral life for the reward of eternal salvation or the fear of an eternity burning in hell? So what if we scare the fucking crap out of children with this lie about fire fire and brimstone? As long as it works, and leads people towards moral decisions, it's a good thing." I think that's sort of true although I also think religion enables a lot of people into making amoral decisions (like Louie isn't banging his secretary...emmiright?) The problem here though is that this type of morality doesn't lend itself to altruism and isn't that where true morality lies? Christianity speaks of a benevolent prophet who was put here for the sole purpose of being tortured and murdered and he did that for us...so that we could live with sin or something. Well, that's all well and good but didn't he get to be a God for it? Or just God? How does that work anyway? Is he God or the son of God but with God-like powers? What is going on with that relationship?

So what kind of world do you want to live in, Christians? One where every decision you make is flirting with your salvation or one where morality lies within you? Do you want to live in a world where you have to credit God for every good thing you do or one where you just rely on your own conscience and an inherent desire to be compassionate and show love? Do you want to live in a world where every time you fuck up it's "free will" but every time you do good you owe it to your faith? Do you want to live in a world where while God ignores the prayers of a woman being locked in a basement and raped by her father every day for 24 effin' years while her children watched but makes sure someone remembers to set a second alarm clock so they don't miss their flight to Hawaii? A world where God can't be there when a three month old baby is having her throat slashed because he's helping some millionaire score a fucking touchdown!!!

Oh I know...the Lord works in mysterious ways. Meanwhile, you have to be some kind of crazy ass narcissist to think that while 18,000 people are drowning in the streets, God was helping you with your History exam.

Look, I understand that when someone promises you eternal salvation, you'll buy into a lot of BS. Where Grohmert misses the point though is that we don't need to become more Christian to progress...we need to become way less Christian. Instead of saying..."Sorry, I already have all the answers. I got them from a book and a priest." Maybe we shouldn't be shutting down our minds like that? Maybe that's what's dangerous.

Lastly, in a country with so much diversity, we hear a lot about "respecting other's beliefs or that we have to respect each other's beliefs." Well for one thing...I don't really have beliefs. I just kind of have ideas. I have no idea if I'm right so it stops me from getting too self-righteous about my own "beliefs." You can't possibly offend me*. However, in anything other than religion, do we really respect each other's beliefs in this country? I don't think we do at all. Even within religion though. I know Christians always preach to atheists and agnostics about respecting their beliefs but how can anyone respect your belief when you believe that we're depraved souls only by virtue of not being a Christian? I have to respect the fact that you think my unbaptized child is a demon? WHY? Nobody really sees how fucked up that is? Do Christians respect Scientologists beliefs? If a politician ever re-ran for office and someone asked him about his faith and he started telling you how he's a polytheist and a big believer in Greek mythology and Apollo is his favorite God...do you think this guy would get re-elected? Do you think more than a quarter of the country would respect that? Of course not...especially Louie Grohmert. I can't stand Louie Grohmert.

Well, that was long but thanks for reading if you made it this far.

* The idea of people being offended is repulsive to me. It's just like...nothing. It doesn't mean anything. There's nothing remotely interesting about it. It's just mindless complaining. Oh you're offended because I think your religion poisons society? Who gives a shit? What does that even mean?

Comments

[Kenny Bania]

Respeck.

[Assman]

First, you've basically synopsized every conversation between Ellie Arroway and Palmer Joss in the movie Contact without crediting them for it. Bad form.

Second, if you read this with the beat from Tupac's Hit Em Up playing in the back of your head, it makes it a lot better.

[Mr. Kruger]

i love it when dumb asses try to rewrite history and quote shit they overheard at a cocktail party. or worse yet, stumbled across on the interwebs.

if prayer got things done i'd be praying 12 hours a day and snowboarding the rest. wouldn't have to go to work: just pray for money. wouldn't have shred fucking ice: just pray for snow. wouldn't have to go to the liquor store: just pray for beer.

no doubt this is what old cue-ball has in mind. sit back and collect that fat money check and pretend you're you got everything under control. it just proves beyond any doubt that religion is biggest scam in the history of this universe.

[Vandelay]

First, you've basically synopsized every conversation between Ellie Arroway and Palmer Joss in the movie Contact without crediting them for it. Bad form.

Sounds like my kind of flick. Not sure I've ever heard of it. Is it about more than two people talking about religion?

[Mr. Kruger]

Is it about more than two people talking about religion?

jodie foster gets an owners manual from aliens on how to build time machine. she goes off to visit her dead father on a magical beach. then the movie ends.

[Vandelay]

Sounds vaguely familiar.

[Assman]

By the way, I wish I could combine this post and Whatley's post before it because they're both essentially saying the same thing.

The biggest reason our country doesn't need to get the fucking sense bombed into it every 20 or so years like Libya, Iran and a few others is that we don't imply that our leaders have divine right and we don't subscribe to religious absolutism. People get religious then give themselves a license to act like lunatics in the name of whatever God they think they're protecting and that includes despotic leaders.

If this Gohmert cat had everything completely his way, we'd start a war with Germany for making their porn too wild. We'd send the National Guard into San Francisco for... well, 65% of everything they do there. But we don't because our government is only driven by the mandate to be sensible and act in the nation's best interest.

jodie foster gets an owners manual from aliens on how to build time machine. she goes off to visit her dead father on a magical beach. then the movie ends.

It's more of a trans-galaxy teleporter designed to help aliens make contact with other aliens. And the big crux of the film is the debate over whether it's more valuable to have faith and no knowledge or all of the world's knowledge with no faith.

[Vandelay]

Exactly Assman, but that's where the self-righteousness comes in. We know wat happens in countries that are governed primarily within the boundaries of religion yet we want this to be a country governed by God. Why? Because our God is better than yours. Our religion is the right one. We base it on nothing but the conviction of our faith. Why is my faith better than your faith? IT JUST IS, ALRIGHT! Oh but we're also very humble...that makes us better than you to...our humility. We get it from the religion we know is right.

Listen up folks...if you really think there's any basis for subscribing to dogma over humanism, it stands to reason that you're headed for damnation. 30,000 religions and everybody knows they got the right one. So even if somebody does have it right; even if one religion absolutely nails it...the laws of probability say there's hardly a chance it's you.

[Mr. Kruger]

People get religious then give themselves a license to act like lunatics in the name of whatever God they think they're protecting and that includes despotic leaders.

fanatics act out but most "religious" ppl are just looking for an easy pass. tax-free shit and the opportunity to scam the gov't into paying for their rock star revivals and yachts and mansions. It's always the same old shit just a different tactic.

And the big crux of the film is the debate over whether it's more valuable to have faith and no knowledge or all of the world's knowledge with no faith.

because we only have two choices.

The biggest reason our country doesn't need to get the fucking sense bombed into it every 20 or so years like Libya, Iran and a few others is that we don't imply that our leaders have divine right and we don't subscribe to religious absolutism.

Which is why Tibet got it's backwards ass kicked right the fuck off and atheist China was just the bitch for the job. see that, i put a little twist in there.

Why is my faith better than your faith?

Because I have a shit load of F-16's that will rain down oceans of pain on your ass. It's that simple.

[Assman]

Which is why Tibet got it's backwards ass kicked right the fuck off and atheist China was just the bitch for the job. see that, i put a little twist in there.

And if Tibet was China's size... how much worse do you think that conflict would look?

Why? Because our God is better than yours. Our religion is the right one.

Which is fine and good, but still creates the problem of absolutism. A good leadership group has the ability to change its mind.

[Vandelay]

Which is fine and good, but still creates the problem of absolutism. A good leadership group has the ability to change its mind.

That's right. A lot of people counter the Crusades, Inquisition, 30 years war, so on and so forth with "Oh but look what the secular regime of Stalin and Mao, and Pot did." It's not necessarily about God, it's about having such conviction in your beliefs that you're ready to force it on everyone. You can be Atheist and still be Messianic.

[H.E. Pennypacker]

You covered a lot of ground there, Vandelay. (How could you not, with a post that long?) There are a lot of classic questions in there, which I won't bother to try to answer, mostly because I don't have answers.

What galls me about this Gohmert guy is that he holds something Ben Franklin said in the 1780s as completely and utterly unquestionable. (Dogma of a different flavour, if you ask me.) Something else Ben Franklin said, in the Pennsylvania Gazette he published, was "Hey, slaves for sale over here!" So maybe these guys weren't as infallible as the good Congressman would have us believe.

Besides, how much has changed since the 1780s? A shit-ton. You mean to tell me that something Ben Franklin said to a room full of other privileged rich slave-owning white land-holders over 230 years ago should be accepted, unquestioned?

It's a living document, that Constitution of yours. It has to be; society changes, world circumstances change, a whole huge group of people are recognized as actual "people" instead of being property to be owned and worked to death. Someone go tell this to Louie Gohmert, and then when you're done, go tell it to Antonin Scalia.

[April]

I wrote a paper in AP English back in High School entitled The Atheist Manifesto. It was an awesome, well researched, well written, kick ass paper. I got a D because my teacher was a holy roller. I argued with him to no end about it and told him that he couldn't give me a bad grade because he didn't agree with what I wrote. He had to grade me on how it was written. He changed it to an A and then told me I had better grow up to be a lawyer.

Anyway, I brought up some of your points. Differing religions, which one is better, having faith, the bible and the hypocrisy in it, and many other things were in the paper. I wish I still had it.

An extremely religious woman that I work with really pisses me off whenever these natural disasters happens. When the Haiti earthquake happened, she said, "You know why that happened, don't you? It's because God is punishing them for not believing in him." She said the same thing with the situation going on in Japan right now. She truly believes that God has done these things to punish those people. What is really bad is that she doesn't feel bad for them. In her mind, they deserve what they got for not believing in God.

I don't know where I'm going with this comment so I'm going to stop now.

[Vandelay]

It's a living document, that Constitution of yours. It has to be; society changes, world circumstances change, a whole huge group of people are recognized as actual "people" instead of being property to be owned and worked to death.

That ties into this whole thing. These people treat the Constitution just like it's the bible and just like the bible, they completely ignore the parts that don't fit into their agenda. Great column on it by Newsweek here...

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/10/17/how-tea-partiers-get-the-constitution-wrong.html

[Vandelay]

When the Haiti earthquake happened, she said, "You know why that happened, don't you? It's because God is punishing them for not believing in him." She said the same thing with the situation going on in Japan right now. She truly believes that God has done these things to punish those people. What is really bad is that she doesn't feel bad for them. In her mind, they deserve what they got for not believing in God.

That's what happens when you have a religion that claims you're sinful just by virtue of being born. This is par for the course. Falwell said that after 9/11, Robertson said it after Haiti, and Beck said it after Japan. It's twisted yet somehow accepted as a theory by many people.

Anyway, that teacher should have been fired on the spot. You shouldn't have to explain to any teacher that they can't grade you based on whether they agree with you or not. I would have been bullshit.

[Dr. Whatley]

If this Gohmert cat had everything completely his way, we'd start a war with Germany for making their porn too wild.

Can we start a war with Germany over all their male porn stars penises having a sleeve? I'm getting a little tired of watching hot blonde German whores having to peel back a turtleneck before slurping away.

Jesus. I need to start praying for a girlfriend.

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