Leave Usain Bolt Alone!!!

If you've been paying any attention to the events over at the China Invitational, you are likely aware of the record-breaking performance of Jamaica's Usain Bolt. In winning the 100m final in a new world record time of 9.69 (!!!), breaking the previous record of 9.72 held by Jamaica's Usain Bolt, Bolt coasted the final 20 meters with arms wide open (he's a huge Creed fan), letting down hundreds of purists and d-bags alike. Many thought he could have run sub 9.6, and some thought that his showboating was showing up his competitors and making a mockery of these Olympics that are being held in an industrial wasteland. A few believe that if Bolt would have sprinted all-out through the finish line, he may have been able to achieve flight. To those people I cry....leave Usain Bolt alone!!!

Here is one such example of anti-Bolt "journalism". I put journalism in quotes because apparently, this guy is arguing that Bolt somehow corrupted the youth of Great Britain with his celebrating. Written by a guy who goes by "The Guardian", the article begins by detailing how Bolt's celebrating was a slap in the face to "us idealists", and insinuates that Bolt could have run a 9.50 had he ran the final like a God damn Olympic champion from Britain and not like a showboating young spoiled athlete. The Guardian then goes through and details all of the former and current British medalists he has met and how humbled and championlike they are and how much they smell like championships and how they gave him tingles in his championbones. To which I reply, after having my neighbor viciously slash me across my face with a rake and with tears streaming down from my eyes, leave Usain Bolt alone!!!

The first argument is opinion, and while it may be retarded opinion (even in the year You Killed Your Kid), it is still opinion nonetheless and cannot be challenged with facts. But...come on, The Guardian! Making a mockery of the sport of track and field? Isn't that a bit extreme? First off, the sprints have had plenty of flashy stars in the past. Michael Johnson was a showman. Donovan Bailey was a showman as far as I can remember. If you just ran faster than any other man on the planet, I think you'd be pretty damn pumped up. I know I would...I'd be the first person to win the Olympic 100m final and immediately whip it out as I crossed the finish line. Second, Bolt wasn't going for the world record that he already owned. He had one thing on his mind, and that was gold. He looked around for his fellow countryman Asafa Powell, who was supposed to challenge him in this race, and realized how far from the pack that he had distanced himself. And then he probably thought, hey, I'm about to win an Olympic gold medal, and he lightly touched his chest and put his arms out. I would be willing to bet an entire year's salary of the Chinese kid that sewed his shoes together that he was just excited about winning the race. The Guardian makes the following argument that both Peter King and I believe to be horsefeathers:

He could have been remembered as the man who ran 9.50 in an Olympic 100m final but instead he'll be remembered as the man who slapped his chest as he crossed the line and that is not in any way as powerful a legacy.

I would bet just the opposite, that the image of Bolt crossing the finish mid-coast will probably be one of the enduring images from these Games, especially for the track events. No matter what he would have run had he held his form through the line, someone is likely to come along and break his record. Does anyone outside of Toronto have strong memories of Donovan Bailey's 9.84 in Atlanta? Probably not as many as those that will remember Bolt's race in 12 years. Plus, the guy is 21. He'll be back. And so I cry, in a high-pitched whine that attracts the attention of the pitbulls that I am brutally fighting in my backyard ring-of-death in the midst of this tropical storm, leave Usain Bolt alone!!!

As to the 9.50, well, luckily, we have actual information to use here. Thanks to the always on top of his game Bobby Pentagonz from the Sportsfrog, who came across this website that breaks down Bolt's race over 10 meter increments, containing the following graph:

You can see where Bolt begins to slow in the final 20 meters, slowing from his 43.9 km/hr (~27.45 mph) max speed to his finish speed at 40 km/hr (~25 mph), or still enough to get some points on his license had he been running through a school zone. The author, Ross Tucker, says:

Remember, a sprinter typically hits peak somewhere between 50 and 60m, but then slows progressively. Bolt's huge victory was created thanks to his incredible 50m stint between 40m and 90m, where he never dropped below 42km/hour.

How much faster can he run?

That is the question flying around today. What if Bolt had not celebrated from 20m out? Could he have run 9.50 seconds? Thompson, who took silver, said he'd run 9.54 seconds. The data above suggest that this is probably a little too optimistic. Even if he had maintained his speed for the final 20m (which is unlikely - he'd probably have dropped off slightly), he would have run 0.09 seconds faster. This would give him a 9.60 second time, which is incredible. More likely, he'd have slowed anyway (as all sprinters do), so I'd guess that his celebrations probably denied him about 0.05s and a time of 9.64s.

And while I would like to see actual data to back up his "all sprinters lose speed at the final" statement, as Bolt is obviously not your typical sprinter, I will take his word for it. Of course, the fact remains that the data does not support the claims of a 9.50. Bolt did not lose nearly as much speed as most people, including myself, tended to think. And, most importantly, I don't think Bolt is losing any sleep over this. It would have been his record, not ours. And so I sit here in a dark corner of my room, my eyes red and my body covered in blood as I goad Ray Lewis to continually stab me in the chest, urging everybody who will listen to please leave Usain Bolt alone!!!

Comments

[Vandelay]

Can't I leave him alone while at the same time thinking he's a showboating, attention-whoring, douchebag? I mean...if I want to teach my kids to treat their accomplishments with some sense of humility, am I bothering Usain Bolt? Should I be worried about offending Vince Wilfork when I teach my kids not to walk up to people and poke them in the eye? Am I gonna get an uncomfortable e-mail from Dahmer when I yell at the baby for biting her sister?

and he lightly touched his chest and put his arms out. I would be willing to bet an entire year's salary of the Chinese kid that sewed his shoes together that he was just excited about winning the race.

He put his arms out as if to say, "Where the fuck are you turtles? Obviously not worthy of being in this race with me." You're completely entitled not to have a problem with that but let's not downplay it here. He was showing off his opponents.

[Newman]

Do you criticize Hines Ward when he hops into the end zone?

And if you want to compare Bolt putting his arms out with Vince Wilfork poking an opposing player in the face and Jeffrey Dahmer eating people, then be my guest. But I'm still going to ask you to politely leave Usain Bolt alone. You don't have to, of course, but I'm asking you to. While huddled in a corner crying.

[Jack Klompus]

"He was showing off his opponents."

And showing up his opponents. I think this relates to the "running up the score" debate. It's not a great example for the kids, but humiliation (unfortunately) is part of life. Children can't be completely protected from it.

I'm not sure, however, if this relates quite as well with serial murder/cannabalism.

[Jack Klompus]

Whatley, what the fuck. Quit stealing my my fuckin carrots.

[Newman]

This whole Airing of Italics thing is starting to get strange.

[Newman]

Whoa, what the hell did you do, Klompus? MY WHOLE WORLD IS IN ITALICS!!!!!

[Vandelay]

Do you criticize Hines Ward when he hops into the end zone?

Ummm...I criticize him every time he opens his mouth. As for hopping into the end zone which I recall him doing once in the Super Bowl, I won't criticize it as much for showing up his opponent as I would for the gayness of it all.

I'm not bothering Usain Bolt. He's a phenomenal athlete who happens to be a little insecure. I'd like to give him a hug.

[Newman]

Now he's insecure? Are you his therapist?

[Vandelay]

It's not even up for debate. When winning isn't enough and an athlete feels that he must taunt his competitors on top of that, he is by nature, extremely insecure. Hines Ward not excluded.

[Newman]

They pretty much all do it. And...yes, it is up for debate, even if you say it isn't.

[phil]

Uhh, Newman, that article was written for the Guardian by Kriss Akabusi, a former Olympic medalist and now a motivational speaker. I guess that's what you do after you spend a lot of time becoming really great at something that can't possibly make you a living.

[phil]

"He's a phenomenal athlete who happens to be a little insecure. I'd like to give him a hug."

There is no limit to how sensitive you can be, Vandelay.

I'm looking for the carats too...

[Newman]

Ha. Phil, I know that the article wasn't really written by "The Guardian".

[Assman]

A 21-year-old guy who also happens to be a world record holding sprinter manages to get on TV in front of hundreds of millions of viewers and he does what a 21-year-old guy does.

I'm all for decorum, class and maturity, but we're talking about a guy being young, insanely proud, winning a gold medal in the bloody Olympics and having approximately 1 second to think about how he should respond to it.

[Newman]

Klompus, I had to edit your comment, because I was just about to start gouging my eyes out.

[Assman]

Oh, and to kill off the carats, just leave another comment that starts with a closing italics tag.

Or log in as an administrator and edit the comment, but who's got that kind of time?

haha... the chest slap may be my favorite memory from this entire Olympics. I love the showboating cockiness and random displays of testosterone. I think it was more "I'm the man" than "these other runners suck," btw. Does self-pride automatically equate to shitting on opponents?

People who hate on Bolt are the same ones that think endzone dances "ruined" football, that screams at the crowd after dunks must be fined, that Mutumbo's finger wag was worthy of technicals, that Muhummad Ali's windup punches detracted from the sport, and that Tiger Woods fist-pump is an arrogant show in the face of the golfers who aren't as good as he is. Emotion is natural and exciting, and we like watching it. Get over it.

This post should be entitled "the pussification of athletics".

[Newman]

This post should be entitled "the pussification of athletics".

Please stop disrespecting Title IX.

[Vandelay]

I'm all for decorum, class and maturity, but we're talking about a guy being young, insanely proud, winning a gold medal in the bloody Olympics and having approximately 1 second to think about how he should respond to it.

...and he chose to respond like a douche. It's really okay not to have a problem with that. Most people don't. There's no need to justify it though. The guy has been competing his whole life. That's who he is. He likes to show up his competition. He choses arrogance over humility. That is a choice though. There's no reason to sugarcoat it. Perhaps he feels that he's so dominant that the margin of victory doesn't make his opponents look bad enough and he felt he needed to do more so he chose to rub it in. Usain Bolt needs that. It's okay.

There's no right or wrong answer here. There are people wo didn't like this shit well before Usain Bolt. He doesn't care. He's fine. He'll look at the tape of him smugly wondering where his opponents are as he crosses the finish line and feel a sense of pride over how clever he was to make that inquiry before the race was over. Good for him. Really.

[soupnazi]

nice to see that being a show-boating bitch is not just reserved for wide recievers-

[jackie]

Vandelay is completely off base here. Completely and utterly.

Has anyone mentioned the pre-race lightning bolt pose?

That was the awesomness.

Usain Bolt is currently my favorite athlete in the world.

[bobby pentagonz]

Most of you already know my take - I don't think he was showboating at all, but rather was expressing utter glee and amazement about how far he was ahead. You can see the 'holy crap, where is everyone else' look in his face.

Not to mention, the 100 meter dash is ALL ABOUT POSTURING. Believe me, I've been to lots and lots of track meets, and have been one of those guys in lane 2 while the dude in lane 4 is killing everyone, easing up and yelling. And that was for an indoor 60 meter dash at a track meet with three teams there.

Sprinters preen, and they hype. It's the nature of the beast, and don't think for a second that most of those other runners wouldn't have done the same kind of thing. Hell, most of them probably would have acted worse.

If they, the one's being shown up aren't offended, then why does anyone else have the right to be offended. You can be turned off by it, think it's egotistical, whatever. but don't pretend to be offended by it. Much like Jackie was saying with the Spanish basketball team, if the people that are on the other end of it aren't offended, then why the hell should you be?

[Vandelay]

Anyone actually offended by it should seek therapy.

[Vandelay]

Vandelay is completely off base here. Completely and utterly.

I'm off base because I prefer the "act like you've been there" approach but have no problem whatsoever with people like you that prefer the showboating approach? How much more open-minded would you like me to be?

[Newman]

You know, act like you've won an Olympic gold medal by a record margin before.

[Vandelay]

You know, act like you've won an Olympic gold medal by a record margin before.

I have no problem with people celebrating and being happy over their accomplishments. I don't like when people's natural reaction is to try to make their opponent's feel worse about not being as good as them. I don't understand that. Never have...never will. It's not something that I value. I'm not offended by it and I could care less if you or anyone else sees it as an admirable human quality. You have every right to that. Unless I see you someday trying to teach my kid that shit, which is an extremely unlikely scenario, feel free to promote such douchebaggery all you'd like.

[phil]

Or like when you won the Series with the Royals in '85...

[Jack Klompus]

It's not Usain's fault. When he was little his daddy told him, "if your're not first, you're last." He's probably lived his whole life by that.

By the way, I just got my first chain email a couple of hours ago. The subject line was "Jamaican Sprinter = Islamofacist! His first name is Usain!"

[Assman]

I understand the "act like you've been there" approach, but...

1.) He's 21. Let he who wasn't a bit of a douche in public when they were 21 throw the first stone.

2.) It's the responsibility of parents and coaches to teach kids to not be dicks in athletics. Douchebags exist all over the world and you can't hide them from the kids. They just have to know to be better than that.

3.) He's a sprinter, and obviously the absolute best in the world at what he does. He's a top athlete and probably has to train his ass off to get there and maintain that level of ability.

And if he just crosses the finish line, despite how awesome he is, none of us know his name. He's no better than whatever Chinese guy won gold in trampoline.

So, if he preens and acts like a jerk to get a little notoriety, and that notoriety turns into fame / endorsements / whatever, doesn't he have a right to profit from his ability?

[Vandelay]

So which was it...a spur of the moment reaction or a pre-meditated attempt to obtain fame / endorsements / whatever?

[puddy]

Re: "acting like you've been there"

That's all well and good for scoring a TD, but I'm with newman on the sprinting.

[Assman]

So which was it...a spur of the moment reaction or a pre-meditated attempt to obtain fame / endorsements / whatever?

Maybe you could ask him. But either is okay with me.

[Newman]

And if he just crosses the finish line, despite how awesome he is, none of us know his name. He's no better than whatever Chinese guy won gold in trampoline.

Disagree completely. We all know Maurice Green, Justin Gatlin, Michael Johnson, etc.

[Dr. Tim Whatley]

Whatley, what the fuck. Quit stealing my my fuckin carrots.

I had nothing to do with it this time, I swear.

[Dr. Tim Whatley]

So, if he preens and acts like a jerk to get a little notoriety, and that notoriety turns into fame / endorsements / whatever, doesn't he have a right to profit from his ability?

Damn right. I think that 70% of both the NBA and the NFL have people that fit this description.

[Ocho Ocho]

None of these answers the question as to why.

Bolt slowed because he has incentive clauses that permit him to earn a bonus each time he breaks the record. So he is setting the bar low enough to beat it repeatedly.

This is no different than pro athletes having significantly better seasons right before eligibility for free agency kicks in.

[Ocho Ocho]

None of these answers the question as to why.

Bolt slowed because he has incentive clauses that permit him to earn a bonus each time he breaks the record. So he is setting the bar low enough to beat it repeatedly.

This is no different than pro athletes having significantly better seasons right before eligibility for free agency kicks in.

[Vandelay]

Ocho, is it impossible to slow down without taunting?

[Ocho Ocho]

None of these answers the question as to why.

Bolt slowed because he has incentive clauses that permit him to earn a bonus each time he breaks the record. So he is setting the bar low enough to beat it repeatedly.

This is no different than pro athletes having significantly better seasons right before eligibility for free agency kicks in.

[Ocho Ocho]

Sorry computer error on my end.

There may be a way to do it without taunting, but its less fun and less profitable.

[Ann Tye]

Does the criticism reflect a disrepect for Jamaica? See dissing of Jamaica in Dowd's NY Times column(8/19/08, which warns Bush that "Russia is not Jamaica." Great coincidence.

[Newman]

I don't buy the record lowering thing. There's no way he could have thought he was going to set a world record if he put his arms out like that.

[Vandelay]

Or that you could time yourself so precisely as to beat the world record but not beat it by too much so that you can't beat it again. That's a pretty small pocket.

[Ocho Ocho]

Wrong. He gets paid for winning Gold. Now, he gets paid for each successive win and record.

And yes he knows how many steps he takes in the 100M and 200M dashes. He knows how many times he breathes. He knows what a good time is and he knows that he can break the WR without going 100%.

Come on really now. Do you know how technical athletics is nowadays? Especially track and field.

[Vandelay]

It's technical enough where dude can make sure he breaks the WR by 5 hundredths of a second but not by more than 7 hundredths of a second? That's insane.

[Newman]

It's not at all that "technical" that he can pick his time. That suggestion is asinine.

eh...the only people complaining are slow small dicked men who are jealous of his speed and package

[Jack Klompus]

"eh...the only people complaining are slow small dicked men who are jealous of his speed and package"

In other words, Dwight Mann.

[Jason H]

Seriously guys....Who was more cocky than Michael Johnson, Gail Devers wasnt a humble one either. The US is upset because for the first time, they are running clean and getting beat. The guy is enjoying what he is doing. He reserves the right to celebrate. The American commentators are so biased in their reports and are so cocky anyway so i daresay it is an act of hypocisy to harp on Bolt's actions. This happens all the time in the NBA and NFL and is accepted. If Bolt was an American, I bet his actions would have been used for an ad. Leave him alone you hypocrites!

[Newman]

Yeah, you smalldicks!