The Airing of Grievances

Stupid Knowledge

 

Here you have a man running for POTUS telling a bunch of people to stop sending their children to college because they are institutions of indoctrination. By indoctrination of course he means teaching them things like science, philosophy,and critical thinking. You know...all that evil shit that catapulted us out of the dark ages. Plus, it's not as if we aren't full of institutions masquerading as colleges but are really just there to brainwash kids with their draconian rules. Nobody is stopping anyone from attending those places.

This man is obviously threatened by knowledge and information. This man obviously has no interest in progressing society and he seems perfectly content to want to drag it back to the dark ages. Yet this man is getting votes in these early primaries at a rather alarming rate. That's very scary to me and it should be to anyone.

Now I know that Asspologist will come along and be all like "No, no...you don't get it, Vandelay. He doesn't REALLY think that. He's just pandering to the lowest common denominator." Perhaps...although I'm not so sure with this loon. Even if that's true though, it's quite clear that him and all of his opponents want nothing more than to keep the ignorant as ignorant as possible. That's not leadership. It's very, very dangerous.

If it is in fact true that education is at odds with faith...and I think Santorum is right about that...the real fool is the one that thinks the problem with that is the education.

Gonna Want That One Back

Here's some footage from an interview with the mayor of New Haven, Connecticut...home of a bunch of Ivy League douchebags and apparently racist cops. When four cops were recently arrested for racial profiling against the Latino community, the mayor had a scandal on his hands and so in full damage control mode he went. Upon being asked what he was going to do to help out the Latino community going forward...well I won't even ruin it for you. It's just too good.

Look At Me, Kruger.

Yes. Look at me when I'm talking to you. Have some respect.

Yeah, you can make fun of Newman's pictures, or tell him that he just doesn't get it, you can even tell him to go fuck himself with Challenger shrapnel. He's a man. He's 40. He can handle it.

But do you get it? Do you really? And do you think I'm at all happy about this? Do you think me and my whale buddies sit around high-finning each other because we are soon to be the talk of the net? Then Kruger...and I mean this with all due respect...you don't know shit about whales.

Seriously, Kruger. You don't know a whale from your fucking tampons. Which, by the way, can give you TSS even if you only stick them in your ass. How do I know this? I READ IT ON WIKIPEDIA! And once that's gone, all you'll know is all I know. Because whales will be the last things left on the internet to ask. Just us. Ask a whale! We'll give you the right answer. Or we might. Fuck if I care what I tell your dumb ass.

We whales are generally private creatures, Kruger. We do not want this attention, this spoktlight. In fact, we detest it. And you worry about the effect of applying the laws of SOPA and PIPA to things like 9 year old girls singing a karaoke version of "Put It In My Mouth" on Youtube, and rightfully so. But you don't give a fuck about us. About the whales. About the effect on us, on our communities, on our children...or calves or cows or whatever. I don't know what we call them. Because fucking Wikipedia is down. But rest Goddamned assured that we love them and we do not want to see it come to this just as much as or maybe even moreso than you humans. And I swear on Paula Deen's diabetes that we'll do all that we can to stop this from coming to fruition.

But in the end, Kruger, we are just whales. Just stupid, pointless whales swimming pointlessly in some pointless water living our whole entire pointless existence, right Kruger? But you humans...you can do something about this. And I don't mean you can comment on some blog posts or raise awareness or shave your pubes or whatever it is that white people love to do these days. Get out the pen and the motherfucking paper and write to your Congressman. Write to your Senator. Write to the fucking President. You don't even have to talk about PIPA every time. Write to your local Representative just to say hi. See how the wife and kids are holding up. But please, do something.

And when you do, Kruger, when you do...we just ask that you put in a polite word for us whales. We trust that's not too much to ask.

A Whale Walks Into a Bar...

...wait, no it doesn't. BECAUSE IT'S A FUCKING WHALE. It can't whale it's way into a damn bar. People would FREAK the hell out, number one. That's not good for the bar's bottom line. Second, the whale would crush just about everything in the bar. Insurance probably doesn't cover that. Thirdly, you'd have to spray water on it the entire time. That creates like 5 problems. Fourth, it probably doesn't drink BECAUSE IT'S A DAMN WHALE. Fifth, like a hundred other things.

This is nonsensical. It's not even funny to think about a whale going into a bar. Yet, that's what PIPA and SOPA would turn the internet into. These would seriously be the only jokes that it would allow to remain on the web. You want that, comrade? Then GET UP and ROCK THE VOTE or the protest or whatever. Seriously. Bombard your local congressman with pictures of whales and jokes about whales and whaleporn and just about all of that not-good stuff. Do it for America. Hell, be selfish. Do it for yourself.

Whales walking into bars. Is this seriously what America is coming to? DROP THE SOPA!

WHALES

 

You pumped? You love that shit, huh? Well you fucking better because this is all that you're going to get on a SOPA-ed internet. Hey, another whale! Great.

Hopefully you all wake up before it's too late. I don't have enough grievances to air at whales. Don't get me wrong, fuck whales. But after like 35 minutes I'd be ready to move on.

AofG SOPA and PIPA Protest

 

This is a potentially pivotal moment for the internet as we know it. So hell yeahs AofG is getting in on the SOPA and PIPA protests. Or at least I am.

Besides being named by tonedeaf Italian immigrants, SOPA and PIPA are going to SUCK! I think. I honestly don't know much about them but on things where just about everybody is against something, I tend to believe they may have a point. Yeah, I know that is not a failproof method, but fuck off I have things to do.

From what I take it, these acts could allow government to shut down websites if there's any copyrighted material on them and imprison people and encourages whistleblowing and stuff like that and if it passes, the internet as you know it will cease to exist. It will pretty much only contain pictures of whales. So, today, I am running nothing but pictures of whales.

So This Seems A Bit Extreme, No?

I have to admit...I had no idea what the hell SOPA and PIPA (Stop On-line Privacy Act & Pro-IP Act) were until this morning when I noticed a bunch of websites are shutting themselves down in protest. So I suppose that the intentions here are good ones as we are well aware that creators of all types of media frequently have their content viewed for free when it was not their intention. I may have even benefitted from this practice before. Hell...there are probably 50 youtube videos on this site alone that this applies to.

Of course the other side of this argument is that these people wouldn't be paying for this shit anyway and in many cases just the exposure will get you some good word of mouth and open up opportunities to make money where they previously wouldn't exist. Anyway, this has been an ongoing fight since the days of Napster and it certainly doesn't appear as if though online piracy is going anywhere. It's okay though, because apparently the government is going to fix it.

I'll do a far shittier job of explaining this than this video that I stole from Vimeo but on the surface; this a little scary...

 

The Ron Paul Fascination

Screw it...I'm on a roll. I don't care who's not listening.

Let's be honest, the crop of contenders for the GOP nomination is laughable. Entertaining as all hell but laughable. The idea that everyone has seemed to come up with is to try to be the more like Reagan than everyone else while also claiming to fiscally responsible despite of the massive debt that we obtained under Reagan. Then there's Ron Paul.

A lot of my friends seem to think it's hip or something to support Ron Paul. Supposedly, he's honest. Trust me though...he's not honest. In fact I can't really muster up any reason to believe that he's any different from Romnewtrickbachorum. He's a libertarian's wet dream but I'm not so sure that he's even a libertarian. Okay there are a couple things perhaps such as he wants to end the war on drugs and he wants to eliminate income taxes.

Outside of that, as far as I can tell he's probably the ost racist of all of them and that's saying something. He wants free markets but he also wants to keep the brown people out. We're talking about a guy that refers to MLK day as "Hate Whitey Day." He wants English to be the official language of the U.S. He doesnt think government should involve itself with gay marriage but he's on record as being opposed to it (like Obama).

Libertarians are usually atheists and this guy is about as big a fundamentalist Christian as you'll find outside of the fellow down in Texas who prayed for rain last April and got fire. He doesn't believe in evolution (more like evilution, emmiright?) or human-assisted global warming (fuck science). For the record, Huntsman is the only person in this crop that accepts the theory of evolution. To put this in perspective, if you look at the age of the planet and what most of these assholes believe the age of the planet is...it would be like saying that the distance between New York and SanFrancisco is 1 yard. That's how wrong they actually are yet perfectly willing to support the idea. Along with this he's not at all a friend of church/state separation which I thought was important to libertarians as well.

Let's see...he's a physician which is interesting. My problem with politics is that everyone always seems to be either a lawyer or a businessman but there aren't really any great thinkers. Where are the scientists and the engineers and the teachers? So here's Paul...a doctor. Must be a smart guy. But wait...he thinks life begins at conception! He also appears not to support any research for alternative energy sources and has a tax plan that would benefit the rich.

How is he not a Republican again?

Her Intolererance is So Charming

So Bachmann becomes the first candidate to sign Iowa's "Marriage Vow," which is basically 14 promises that any Republican candidate has to make in order to be considered a viable candidate I suppose. Anyway, this thing is awesome...

"Vigorous opposition to any redefinition of the Institution of Marriage – faithful monogamy between one man and one woman – through statutory-, bureaucratic-, or court-imposed recognition of intimate unions which are bigamous, polygamous, polyandrous, same-sex, etc."

Got it...just like the Constitution says...

"Official fidelity to the U.S. Constitution, supporting the elevation of none but faithful constitutionalists as judges or justices."

Wair for it...WAIT FOR IT...

"Steadfast embrace of a federal Marriage Amendment to the U.S. Constitution which protects the definition of marriage as between one man and one woman in all of the United States."

The Morons Are Coming

Just take a quick moment to allow BFF explain the story of Paul revere to us...

Please let this women run for POTUS. I will register as a Republican just so I can vote for her in the primary.