Oh, sh-sh-sh-shut the fuck up. I don't care how great of a game it was. I am a Steelers fan. I want the Steelers to win. When they lose, I don't enjoy watching it. When they lose in a playoff game, I really don't enjoy watching it. When they lose like they did yesterday in a playoff game, it puts the lives of nearby kittens and small children at risk. So don't tell me it was a great game.
I don't care if the QB that went to the college you liked played very well for a team in a city that you've never been to. I don't care how entertaining it was. For me, the most entertaining Steeler games are the ones where they beat Cleveland 48-3. I like the Saints-Packers games and the Lions-Bears games of the world to entertain me. They can be thrilling as fuck. Matt Forte can heroically lead his team to victory, scoring the go-ahead touchdown with 58 seconds left, and I'll watch intently. Because I don't give the slightest darn who wins.
But the Steelers...that is the team that I am a fan of. So I want them to win games ugly. I don't want them to lose games pretty. So don't tell me how great that game was. BECAUSE IT SUCKED. Tim Tebow's team winning a wild card game in overtime does not show how great God's love is. Unless you believe that God hates Troy Polamalu and Ike Taylor. Why aren't you also saying this to other people who have watched their "team" lose?
- Hey, Germany...come on guys. It was a great war. You guys fought hard. Seriously, it looked like you had it there until the end. But I wouldn't go into Russia. May want to replace the coach if he's going to make decisions like that.
- NASCAR fans...come on guys. I know Earnhardt was killed there at the end but he was in 3rd place coming into the turn. That's a damn good performance. It really was a great race. Plus, his son was able to pick up second. You really can't ask for more. Except for maybe Earnhardt not dying.
- Taxpayers...come on! I know you are paying for banking bailouts and also for your own fuckawful mortgages but last fiscal season was AWESOME! Everybody was getting houses. BAM! House. POOF! Condos. Man, was that an exciting construction season. Sorry you lost your house, though.
- Hatians! Come on gu...nah, I'm joking.
But come the fuck on, friends. Don't tell me it was an exciting game. Or an awesome game. Or a Godly game. Or that it proved the critics wrong. Because I don't care. I DO. NOT. CARE. And everytime you mention something about the game, I'm going to Photoshop ejaculate onto a Denver Bronco.