In this week's edition of News That Is Surprising to Exactly Nobody, Paula Deen came out of the pantry and revealed her secret life as a diabetic.
I'm strongly tempted to do a Chiles-trademarked "that is all" here, but it's possible that you may be one of the 12 assholes I meet every month who tell me they don't watch TV and that, when they do, it's only the Walking Dead.
Paula Deen is a TV chef / famous southerner / gravy advocate. Everything she cooks comes with a light coating of Ronald McDonald's semen on it. You can't even attempt to make one of her recipes at home without wearing a pair of pants with an elastic band. Of course she's going to get diabetes. Of course.
I wish her well. Up next, "Tim Tebow is secretly gay" and "Mitt Romney is caught on video using the N-word a lot."