I'll be your MoC once again for this year's Festivus celebration because apparently I did a kick ass job of it last year. Wait until you see me with a year of experience under my belt. A corporate decision was made in the company meeting to celebrate Festivus on Friday, Dec 19th even though it traditionally falls on the 23rd. We figure less people are around the closer to Christmas. This seemed to work out well last year...a year in which we shattered a record with 48 grievances! That's a whole lot of angst and seemingly nobody was safe. Of course God as always was a popular target but it hardly stopped there. Among the most despised entities were chicks from South Florida who don't like a good cock-whipping, da Raiduhs, Assman, pointless platitudes, Us, The Cuntsnizzles at Barksdale AFB, me, me again, me yet again, pussy-ass curlers that can't play through pain, Canadian border patrol, and pigeons. Let's also never forget how insecure and vulnerable and kind of whorish that the world can be when a Spanish onion is suggested to her. We actually had a random e-mail a couple of months ago that described that as the greatest thing ever written in the history of everything, ever. So suck on that, Tolstoy.
Anyway, we're looking to make this year's celebration equally as successful and that can only happen with your participation. Send e-mails with your grievances to festivus1223@gmail.com, preferrably by Friday, the 19th but I will be taking them that day as well. If you have links and you know html, I'd prefer that you code everything yourself but if not...no big deal. That's pretty much it. Get your grieve on, everyone!
For anyone that has no idea what I'm talking about, Festivus is basically the reason this blog exists...
My work internet has prevented me from making cheeky comments
Posted by: Crazy Joe Davola | December 14, 2008 at 07:23 PM