Hot Funk, Cool Punk...Even If It's Old Junk?
John Lennon once said "If you tried to give rock and roll another name, you might call it 'Chuck Berry'." Unfortunately, Timberlake's tribute to Madonna when he inducted her into the R&R HoF last night wasn't quite as poignant. I think that the most Rock & Roll thing he could have said is, "Madonna? Really? You've got to be kidding me! What the fuck is so Rock & Roll about Madonna?"...and then give an impromptu performance of "Dick in a Box." Instead we got to hear about the time that she injected B-12 in his ass, (Didn't we just go through that?) followed by the inevitable speech providing a hearty "fuck-you" to "everyone who didn't believe in me." God, I hate that shit. Again...I blame the Patriots.
So basically this means that Madonna has been around for 25 years which in turn means that unless you don't have vivid memories of her dry-humping the floor in a wedding dress on MTV, you're probably getting old. It also means that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame should consider changing it's name because if Madonna and Michael Jackson can get in there, aren't we only a few years away from having to relive this shit?
One more thing...unless you're on your deathbed, if you actually decline to perform at your R&R HoF induction, and instead have Iggy Pop perform your songs for you...you're not Rock & Roll enough to be inducted.
My childhood memories of Madonna involve a different type of "dry humping" altogether. But hey, maybe that's just me.
Posted by: jackie | March 11, 2008 at 03:08 PM
One more thing...unless you're on your deathbed, if you actually decline to perform at your R&R HoF induction, and instead have Iggy Pop perform your songs for you...you're not Rock & Roll enough to be inducted.
Wha? Maybe they just consider the rock and roll hall of fame a pathetic joke, and had no interest showing up in the same area code as Timberlake and Madonna.
Posted by: daveNYC | March 11, 2008 at 04:40 PM
Dave, I have no idea what you mean by that. Who are the "they" that you're referring to?
Posted by: Art Vandelay | March 11, 2008 at 05:03 PM
Aw fuck me. Next time I should read the whole story.
I hereby change my 4:40 comment to "I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit, it's the only way to be sure."
Posted by: daveNYC | March 11, 2008 at 06:33 PM
Oh, fuck me. Every year I look at the nominees and say, "Phew! I don't have to watch that shit." So, I tuned in for the last 45. Hey Madonna, if you aren't smart enough to give a speech without 5 pages of verbatim rubbish, don't bother.
That goes for you too, Billy Joel. But at least you were occasionally funny.
I didn't mind the Mellancamp rant nor that he's in there. But really, Cougar, it couldn't have been as weepy and sad as you depicted it. But nice try.
Finally, every year I'm glad they don't induct Rush into this and if they did, I don't see how those guys would even show up for it.
Gezunt.
Posted by: ZaZ | March 12, 2008 at 02:58 PM
I thought Billy Joel was fantastic.
Posted by: Art Vandelay | March 12, 2008 at 05:43 PM