Oh My...
That baby you see there was unexpectedly born 10 weeks premature earlier today and weighs in at 3.22 pounds. Will she survive? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say yes in light of the fact that she was born in a bathroom on a moving train and fell through the toilet onto the train tracks where she lay for an hour and a half!!! WTF?
"We do not expect such children to survive," Jain said.
Really? You think? Does he mean that they don't expect 10 week premature babies to survive or they don't expect babies that fall through toilets on moving trains to survive? Finally...and this is the piece that really seems to be missing from the story...how did the fucking baby get in the toilet? Did the mother sit down to defecate and couldn't tell the difference between that and a person?
Seriously. This is just insane.
An EXTREMELY secondary issue here, but, are trains dumping human waste on the tracks as they go by? How did the contents (in this case a baby) get dumped? And mom must be some kind of moron as well. "Such children"? This suggests there have been others. Really? Is this the best official comment they could come up with?
Posted by: phil | February 28, 2008 at 11:23 AM
Phil -- why don't you think they want you to use bathrooms when you are parked in the station? Where do you think it all goes?
Posted by: Kristal K | February 28, 2008 at 11:40 AM
"Where do you think it all goes?"
Not a train rider (here in the great Southwest, land of "I ride solo dammit"), so I don't know where it all goes. I just know there are public sanitation codes in municipal law, and my own code of it just ain't right dumping shit on the ground. There are storage tanks on buses, planes, and boats. Yeah, they aren't supposed to, but they probably dump them too. Here it just looks like there is just a hole in the floor under the john. As Vandelay says, this is insane.
Posted by: phil | February 28, 2008 at 12:11 PM
and we wonder why immigrants USED TO BE expected to adopt American culture and morals--now, thanks to all the idiots that insist on "multi-culturalism", we Americans can look right here to our future!!
Posted by: soupnazi | February 28, 2008 at 01:22 PM
I thought they stored it in the caboose.
Posted by: Crazy Joe Davola | February 28, 2008 at 01:23 PM
Something else just occurred to me. Wouldn't the baby be dragged by train from the umbilical cord? I've cut one of those fuckers twice. They're not exactly flimsy.
Posted by: Art Vandelay | February 28, 2008 at 01:25 PM
and we wonder why immigrants USED TO BE expected to adopt American culture and morals
Culture and morals? You mean like "Leave it to Beaver". Will the real Nancy Reagan please stand up.
I've cut one of those fuckers twice. They're not exactly flimsy.
Looks like I'm skipping lunch today.
Posted by: Mr. Kruger | February 28, 2008 at 01:38 PM
That baby looks super-healthy and strong for a 30-weeker, I gotta tell you. The born-in-a-toilet, fell-out-of-a-moving-train thing? Amazingly strong baby.
You'd be surprised how many babies are born in toilets. Apparently the urge to push can sometimes be confused with the urge to doo-doo, and the same pubococcygeal muscles are called into action. Those teenagers who don't know they're pregnant and give birth in the school bathroom at the dance? Yeah, they probably thought they had to take a massive dump and were having really bad gas pains.
Posted by: Schmoopie | February 28, 2008 at 02:40 PM
Schmoopie, with all due respect...WHAT????
Really, I'm having a hard time buying this. I suppose I couldn't possibly know how those two things don't feel the same but I mean...come on now. It seems like urban legend.
I have to think this lady had the baby, cut the chord, and threw it down the toilet.
Posted by: Art Vandelay | February 28, 2008 at 02:49 PM
No, seriously. I told a friend this story today, and she said that her sister-in-law—a successful woman—had given birth on the toilet. These things happen. Honestly.
Mind you, sometimes it's not an accident. Sometimes they're in denial about the pregnancy and do not want the baby (as written about in the Journal of Forensic Science).
Also—this may not be something you want to hear—many women crap during delivery. They're pushing, pushing, pushi—whoops, here's the turd. Congratulations! It's a poo! I had a C-section so I can't attest to this personally, but my sister reported that the nurse whisked it away quickly and made no big deal about it. (a) It's routine. (b) Nurses are woefully underpaid!
Posted by: Schmoopie | February 28, 2008 at 06:41 PM
I have to think this lady had the baby, cut the chord, and threw it down the toilet.
Well you'd be able to tell if the cord was cut. If the baby dropped straight out, then it either managed to pull the placenta right out with it, or it ripped off from the placenta. If she cut it, there'd be a flat end, and I imagine the cord would be on the short side.
Crapping while giving birth. That's the level of detail I was OK with not knowing.
Posted by: daveNYC | February 29, 2008 at 06:33 PM