THE AofG FESTIVUS EXTRAVAGANZA - 2007

Happy effin' Festivus, fellow grievers. As they say...this one's for the rest of us.

As you probably already know, this is an unofficial observance of Festivus. The powers that be thought it best that we maximize attendance in light of the actual Holiday falling on Sunday. That's some brilliant shit, right there. We'll be simulcasting live here from chez Vandelay as we wait for the DirecTV guy to show up and install my HD receiver. I'm gonna make multi-tasking a new art as I attempt to play the MoC here while trying to tend to a one year old, entertain a 5 year old, and yell at the DirecTV guy. A lesser man wouldn't even atempt this.

There have been a lot of changes this past year here at the Grieve. Founding father Frank found serenity, took his shit and left, and Cozmo got burnt out by his eliptical, but we certainly appreciate the foundation that those cats laid out. Along with Chiles, a new generation of grievers has carried the load and it's been a pretty cool ride. We even made history when we got lit up by MySpace to the tune of 253 comments, and we loved every minute of it. RIP Wolverine! Anyway, a big shout out to anyone who took the time this year to drop by and see us cynical bastards. Thanks.

As usual we'll start out with the Airing of Grievances and then have a ilittle Feats of Strength later on (I got this this year Johnnie...Festivus isn't ending). If anyone wants to get in a last minute grievance, just send an e-mail to festivus1223@gmail.com prior to noon or so and we'll get you in.

Without further ado...let's grieve!

-Frank
-Jackie Chiles
-Vandelay
-Assman - Part I
-Assman - Part II
-Assman - Part III
-Brian
-Mark (aka Unholy Moses)
-Flash
-Jack Klompus
-Johnnie from the Swamp
-Craig
-Will from Deadspin
-Schmoopie
-Sam from Slam
-Johnny Hotcakes
-Paul Katcher
-Eli
-John Pike
-Cozmo
-SL22
-DFS
-Downsview
-Scott
-Memphis Bengal
-Itchy
-DaveinNYC
-DSafetyGuy
-Puddy
-Matt
-Brontoburglar
-TMan
-ZMan
-AlexFritz
-EdKranepool
-SCKid
-KristalK
-H.E. PennyPacker
-President Cerrano
-ToTheBank
-Rush2112
-Govmentchedda
-TexansTragedy
-Soup Nazi
-Delores
-Boybleu
-Oiler
-Chris_l
-Day 1 Wrap
-Feats of Stength

Comments

[Art Vandelay]

We have a lot to get to so starting around nine-ish, I'm gonna be leting these babies go about every 15 minutes or so.

For now, I need my rest.

This is so someone else's job next year.

[jackie]

Quite yer bitching, Vandelay.

Seriously though, thanks for taking care of everything. You da man.

Frank and Cozmo are definitely missed, but the new blood of you, Assman, Klompus and now Crazy Joe D have been carrying this place. I've just pretty much been sitting back, taking notes and awestruck by how Klompus can consistently be such a fucking asshole.

Happy Festivus to everyone and I hope I'm not in Vandelay's doghouse for getting my and Frank's grievances up too early.

Let's make this The Best Festivus Ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Frank]

Good luck, Vandelay, it's a long day. By the end of last year's Festivus, I was screaming "SERENITY NOW!!" at the top of my lungs and folded to Johnny in the Feats of Strength faster than a reformed junkie in a shooting gallery.

[Craig]

Something tells me I'm not going to be getting very much done today.

[Flash]

DirecTV HD? I guess Beyonce's mind numbingly terrible commercial is more effective than I thought.

[Art Vandelay]

Something tells me I'm not going to be getting very much done today.

Nope.

[Craig]

DirecTV HD? I guess Beyonce's mind numbingly terrible commercial is more effective than I thought.

Holy Festivus Miracles, Batman! It's Flash. I thought her appearance as a commenter on here was just an urban internet legend.

[Art Vandelay]

This is a fucking heroic effort by everyone.

[puddy]

I agree. Great stuff.

[Cozmo]

Vandelay - keep it up, baby. Home stretch.

[Craig]

Very nice job keeping all this organized Vandelay.

[Art Vandelay]

Cut me!!!

[jackie]

"This is a fucking heroic effort by everyone."

Especially you. Great job, my friend. Truly excellent effort.