KristalK goes after the MoC

This is a blatant violation on the Festivus rule book but we'll let you have at it anyway, Belichick.

I'd like to address Art Vandelay. You called 33 year old women middle aged. For this I will hate you forever. I'm 33, I get carded and I get hit on by 26 year old guys -- not because I am a "cougar" but because they think I am their peer. Just because you are an old man in your 30s, don't damn the women of your generation to your same fate.

To the 2000 New York Yankees. I thought I hated you. I thought I despised you. I thought I carried an irrational grudge fueled my own team's frustrations. I realized last week, I hate you even more than I already did; but, it's okay, the stars and the steroids were aligned against us. We had no chance in 2000 against your cheatin' asses. My thoughts were confirmed: you are not just a--holes but nothing but a lousy bunch of cheating, roid raging, bunch of a--holes.

I'd like the World Series trophy hand-delivered to Shea Stadium by Roger Clemens with a) an apology for almost killing Mike Piazza during Game 2; and b) he should be crawling on his hand & knees.

George Mitchell is a hero in this world and I thank him for making sure that "The Rocket" never makes it to the Hall of Fame.

To MTV. I hate that thanks to my TiVo! I can tape your crap reality TV in the middle of the day & watch you in a total of 10 minutes. This life "convenience" has me 100% addicted to your crap reality TV -- namely, The Hills & Laguna Beach.

Happily, I came out of the closet recently and I learned, everyone TiVos this crap & watches it -- I'm not alone in my hatred of Spencer & Heidi and everyone agrees that Lauren should be with the super-hot Brody -- more importantly, I learned that Britney Canada-Whore is a real person with feelings, just like us.

I hate that crap this is better than any "scripted" show on TV and writers-schmiters, with stuff like this, I'm okay without new episodes of How I Met Your Mother -- for now.

Lastly, to Britney Spears, Jamie-Lynne Spears & K-Fed -- just a little thank you -- my morning coffee would not be the same without you on tmz everyday.

Comments

[SL22]

Hey coug.

[Assman]

33 is when the grown-up sexy starts to settle in.

[Schmoopie]

And six to eight years after that, Assman, look out. Rowr!

[jackie]

"To the 2000 New York Yankees...We had no chance in 2000 against your cheatin' asses."

Please STFU with that. Piazza was taking ass injections too.

[ZaZ]

This felt like a large dose of estrogen.
I think I just got emotional for a minute.